Although each situation is unique and each divorce is different, seeking the advice of previous divorcees may provide you with a better understanding of what you can expect during the process, and more importantly, what to expect during the divorce proceedings and after the divorce is final.
It is easy to use social media as a platform to rant about your soon to be ex, and although you will get a variety of opinions, it is strongly advised to refrain from this type behavior. In the same manner, do not use your divorce lawyer as your therapist, to bash your soon to be ex. Below are a six more things you may not have considered during a divorce.
Your view of finances will change dramatically, especially, if you were not used to paying the monthly bills and/or saving for life unexpected financial situations. Many women fight to remain in the family home, especially, if children are involved, but they soon find out that they are unable to pay the current mortgage and/or unable to refinance.
Get professional financial advice
Due to the fact of a shift in how finances are viewed, seeking the advice of a professional financial advisor is just as important, as retaining the services of a good divorce attorney.
Divorce feels like a death of a loved one and should be treated as such, regardless of any wrongdoing that you ex-spouse may have done. Some people may think that because divorce, unlike death, is a choice, that the pain of loss is not as significant – but that simply is not true.
Boredom should be expected
During the drama associated with the divorce process, you mind may be filled with all the exciting things that you will be doing after you sign on the dotted line. The truth is that life after divorce can be quiet boring and mundane.
Divorce can turn really ugly, very quickly
We have all heard the divorce horror stories, but you believe that you and ex-spouse are beyond this type of ugliness. The truth is that you are not. We all have the potential to lash out and hurt back when we are hurt. Prepare to see the worst of human nature come out during your divorce proceeding.
You may have a moment of regret
Although you are confident that the split is the best thing for you, a year or so down the line, you maybe second guessing your decision, especially, when you know that your ex is moving on. You may experience feelings of jealously, even though you were miserable being married to this person. You may be entertaining thoughts, if the children would have been better off in a two parent household. As you look back over time, you may be putting on “rose-colored glasses”, and think more of the good times, instead of the bad.
The reality is that all marriages have both good and bad times. It is advised to do whatever is necessary to maintain a healthy and realistic view of the situation, as you enter the post-divorce period.